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I am doing my storybook project on Untold Stories from the Fairytale Police Station! I am going to share the criminal accounts of Cinderella, Rapunzel, and the Evil Stepmother!
(Fairytale Prison: Pinterest)
Introduction to Me
All About Me Hi y'all! My name is Morgan Pask and I am currently enrolled in Mythology and Folklore this semester! For this assignment, I wanted to share a little bit about me so y'all can get to know me better! Let's jump in! (Me at Rosemary Beach, FL) I was born on September 24th, 1998 in Dayton, Ohio! I have one older sister, Mackenzie who is twenty 24 years old! Shortly after being born, my family packed our bags and moved to the sunny state of California! My dad was working for HP at the time so that's what triggered the move. My family LOVED California! There we endless trips to Disney, countless days playing in the waves at the beach, and numerous afternoons just soaking in the sunshine! After five short years, we packed up again and moved to The Woodlands, Texas! The Woodlands is a suburb of Houston! We lived there for fourteen years and that's where I completed all my schooling! Fast forward to present day, you can find my family settled in Dallas,
Hi Morgan, first I LOVE your storybook idea! It's honestly really funny and I'm definitely going to be keeping up with this throughout the semester. Just reading the Intro got me hooked, so well done with that! I also really like that you chose to do the stories from their perspectives, instead of someone else telling us about it. You introduce Cinderella's rebellion very quickly into her story, which I like. Straight from the beginning you can tell it's going to be totally different. You also threw in several small details from the old versions which were fun when I discovered them (playing in ashes, midnight curfew). I was not expecting Cindy to send the ravens after her family, what a plot twist! I think the only suggestion I have is to be careful with your wording. Sometimes I got a little lost and had to go back and reread the section. This happens to me too and it's an easy fix.
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I already love this concept. In so many fairy tales, there's always the stereotypical "good girl princess" or the "big bad villain", and the story always tries to sell that storyline, regardless of whether the "princess" might be doing sneaky things or the "villain" doing things that aren't that bad. I also like that you gave us a little bit of insight into each princess in jail and how they ended up there in the introduction. Immediately just from hearing the basic topic, it reminds me of a really funny (cconspiracy?) theory that started a few years ago. If these are about Disney princesses, I would hope that you've seen High School Musical; there's this whole theory that Sharpay from the movie is actually the hero instead of the villain.
On your story, I would maybe include a little bit more information about her prison sentence. Is she forced to starve in her jail cell forever? How strict is this prison?
Nonetheless, good job so far!
This is the conspiracy theory I am referring to: https://www.buzzfeed.com/jenniferabidor/this-sharpay-theory-will-change-everything-you-thought-you
Hello, I always loved princesses growing up and was obsessed with fairytale endings. I am very intrigued by your dark twist of some very well-known princesses and their stories. I also really enjoyed the sneak peak of what the stories are going to be and thought that was a nice contribution to your introduction of your story series. My question would be though, if you were to write on of the stories and did not like it would you just switch stories in your introduction? Overall, I am really excited to read the rest of your stories because they seem very intriguing to me. Best of luck on this project!
ReplyDeleteHey Morgan! Your concept for your storybook is so incredibly creative! I think it's such a fun play on classic fairytales and it's obvious that your imagination and creativity is shining. The pictures you use alone are already great introductions to the context of your stories. Reading through both the intro and Cindy's story, I liked the plot and imagery that it gave. I thought it was very effective and switching up the Cinderella story like that was really fun to read. The biggest things I noticed that could use some tweaking were some grammatical errors and story structure. I'm a huge nerd on grammar and spelling, so I just always notice when something could be improved. For some of your sentences, I would redo the punctuation, changing an exclamation point to a comma and replacing a comma with a dash. This will help for readability and flow. As far as structure goes, the breaking up of Cindy's story made it somewhat hard to follow at times, so grouping more of those little paragraphs together for one big one would be more effective. Great context though and great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteSuper creative idea for your storybook! I absolutely love it! I think what I really love the most is the super dark twist you’re putting on the usual overly happy and sappy stories. I’m super intrigued by Cindy’s story. I can’t wait to find out what the black magic show is… And then the mention of an evil stepmother that possibly drugs her stepdaughter or others?! WOW, what a game changer! I’m so hooked! I especially liked the picture in your storybook. They really help give a good visual to your stories and the change in your story versus the original! I thought the picture for Cindy’s story is so funny (I was cracking up in the middle of Barnes and Noble). The only thing I would change is some grammar stuff in the Cindy story! There are a few places you didn’t include an apostrophe or comma where they were needed but besides that, your storybook looks great!
Hey Morgan, I really love this theme for your storybook! I, too, am doing a fairytale theme. However, I really like the direction you took this one! I think Cindy's story is so funny! There are only a couple grammatical errors that I would change. Overall, your storybook looks great and is very user friendly, which I really appreciate.
ReplyDeleteI know there is a book or play out there somewhere that has fairytale princess criminal stories that I saw used a lot in high school speech and debate. I'm not sure what the book is called, but I think it could be a good resource for you! If I find it, I will let you know!
Hi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteI really love the concept of your storybook. I think it is very creative and will end up being very entertaining for people to read. I think especially since you are doing stories on Cinderella, Snow White and Rapunzal who are all known to be good girls who follow the rules and obey what they are told to do. I think it is great because it is actually very comical because no one would expect to hear the approach of these characters in this point of view so I think the initial concept draws the readers in. I also love that they tie to the original stories and the crimes that they are being charged for committing relate to the original stories in a way. I think it would be very interesting to go into what the step sisters did when cinderella was in jail as well. For example, did they ever visit her or did they just let her be there on her own because of the way she acted.
Hey Morgan,
ReplyDeleteI love this idea for a storybook! It has so much room for creativity and more fantastic stories from the fairy tale land. As for the Cinderella story, I never saw this coming. I had never thought of Cinderella being a dark, moody princess, but you told the story amazingly! I wonder why she decided not to use her mother's horrendous death as a wake up call to become a better person, I know I certainly would! What if you went more in-depth with what Cinderella and her mothers relationship was like before she passed? I think this would provide for great insight to why she acts this way now and why her mother's death did not really affect her. I cannot wait to read more of your storybook stories, you really peaked my interest here!
Best,
Payton
Hi Morgan,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed looking through your storybook! Not only is your idea of twisting princess stories to be dark awesome, but your website is just as great. I love all the images you included and everything looks so organized. After going through your page I definitely have some ideas for mine as well. Your cinderella story is a great read. Overall I love your work so far and look forward to reading more.
Hi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteThis is such an amazing idea for a storybook! I love that you took something we all grew up with and made it your own. (Side note: THANK YOU for using the Brothers' Grimm version as inspiration - I was obsessed with Grimm's fairy tales when I was little, so, while I enjoyed the Disney version, I was always looking for a version that was a little bit darker and truer to the Grimm story). I think you do a really fantastic job of giving Cinderella some motivation aside from the stereotypical, "girl wants to fall in love and get married" narrative, which I love! The one thing I would mention to fix up is a few grammatical errors. There were a couple comma splices, and there's also the phrase, "I could care less." It's a commonly misused phrase, but the correct version is, "I couldn't care less," and that more accurately portrays the emotions that Cinderella is feeling in the moment. Overall, though, that's me being a bit nit-picky. I think that the story is wonderful, and I'm excited to see your creativity throughout the rest of the semester!
Hi Morgan, Just from the name alone, I could tell this was going to be unlike any of the princess stories I knew. Even from the inspiration of the Brothers Grimm, which were much more dark, this went different and Cindy was an extremely interesting character. I really enjoyed the dialogue and that you had so many speaking parts, I often forget to put them in and just retell things. Tying the story to her breaking curfew was a great idea. Your imagery was very vivid and the crimson snow really stood out for the description, and I liked the graphic that you used of Cinderella's mugshot. I wonder if there is another image out there that depicts a darker Cinderella too. You kept the story brief but managed to put a lot of details in and it was a fun read. I'll be interested to see what trouble the other princesses get into.
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan, You do an excellent job with taking something that a lot people knowing about and doing a twist that is sure to get instant attention from almost anyone. I love the idea of looking at these characters not as heroines but what they did wrong and got away with. You not only did a great job with the idea but the execution was also done very well. It is very interesting to hear the stories told from the different perspective in the introduction and it does a really good job of making the reader to want to read more and to see these changes in action. Besides the fun writing to read I also just love the look of your website not only is it super cute but I love all of the images on it it only helps to aid in the imagination and it just makes this class even more fun and enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteThe pictures you chose for your Storybook are awesome! They really drew me into the story with how funny taking cartoons and making them devious is. I really think the plot that you chose is super interesting as well. I love that Cinderella is a rebel and does bad things to end up in prison because I think it's a nice twist on the cartoon character. The ending of this story was so shocking! I was not expecting Cinderella to have her whole family murdered, especially not her father so that was definitely an unexpected and fascinating turn. As much as I love Cinderella's character here though, she's not very likable. If your goal was to make her unlikable then that's great because you've succeeded, but you might consider giving her more sympathetic elements if you want her to be more likable. It would also be interesting if you included more of a relationship between herself and her father so that when things go bad between them, it really hurts your audience even more than the shock of Cinderella's cold bloodedness. Anyways, this was an excellent Storybook! Awesome job!
Hi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteFirst off, this storybook idea is hilarious. I think it really appeals to us as readers since we grew up watching disney movies but the plot elements are very twisted and is the complete opposite of what we were taught about these characters growing up! The first story about Cinderella was very surprising. The character traits that she displayed in the storybook are completely juxtaposed with her image from Disney. I like that you included the original element of her not getting along with her stepsisters but put it in the context of this new story. I certainly didn't expect her to have her entire family murdered and rot away in a jail cell. Maybe for the next story try and get a little more in depth into the actual character traits and personalities. This might bring more emotional appeal to the audience and help us understand her motives more. Otherwise, there were a few grammatical errors that would be really quick to fix. I really liked this storybook and good job!
Hi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteWow, did I enjoy your take on Cinderella or 'Cindy'! I think it was super fun the way you took the plot as not many people focus on the Brothers Grimm versions of fairytales, which in my opinion are much more interesting. I think one thing I was confused about would be the timeline of her mother's death. It is a very short spot, but upon first reading it seemed that she died the winter that Cinderella was born, but then her father talks to her like she is at least at the age to comprehend what is happening so it was just a bit unclear of when exactly she died. Other than that I think you have a very good story. One other thing I admire is that you took the focus off of her finding a man and instead she found her place in prison with no mention of a man. I like that because few fairytales make it not about true love. I cannot wait to read more from you!
Hi Morgan!
ReplyDeleteI like your introduction. I think that it leads into your Cinderella story nicely. I like the twist on the stories and the idea is really fun. I would, in the introduction, clear up a couple of sentences on why the stories have been modified in the press. I wasn't expecting such a dramatic turn in the story of Cinderella when I read it, although I think I would enjoy that movie also. I do think that you did a good job incorporating the Brother's Grimm. They have a tendency to twist and turn in ways that are not expecting and I think you did a great job at doing that also. As for the Cinderella story, I liked that you changed the other characters too. While she was out causing trouble, her step sisters were as perfect as can be. This adds to the plot change that you have set up and adds a little spice too it. I would love to see them interact more, perhaps they try to change her. Surely if they are that good of gals, they want a good relationship with their step sister?
Hi Morgan,
ReplyDeleteI am from the Epics of India class and your project stood out the most for me, so I chose it for this week's assignment. The premise of your storybook was really interesting and it shows that you have a lot of creativity. I read your story on Cinderella and my opinions were confirmed. I liked how you were able to take a character that is known to be "good" and add another dimension to her character. I liked how you changed the Fairy God Mother to be a bunch of crows. The parallels between the white dress and her blood red dress were fantastic. Although the story was a little bit more morbid that the original, I still enjoyed it thoroughly. Your author's notes allowed me to understand why you wrote it and was really good when it came to giving background information. Although I'm in the Epics of India class, I will try to read more of your stories in the future.
Hi Morgan, this is such a fun idea to do your storybook over. I love how Cinderella is not the perfect princess that she is made out to be in the classic fairytale. The picture you chose for this story is so funny. The ending of this story was very disturbing but interesting nevertheless. I also love your Rapunzel stories. I like how there is a meaning to the end of the stories. I specifically love your ending to Rapunzel's story because in all of these princess stories, the girls just randomly end up with some guy they just met. It is very unrealistic that two people just fall in love in a second. It was very sad but realistic how the guy just kind of shrugged it off when she was being convicted. Overall, amazing story idea and great stories. I cant wait to read more of your stories.
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan,
ReplyDeleteI really loved your website so much the first time that I just knew that I would have to come back to get more. I was so happy to see a part one and two to the Rapunzel story and I think you did such a fantastic job with splinting it up. I love the idea about all of these princess that we know the stories of and looking at why they broke the rules and them having to deal with the punishments of breaking said rules. This story was so fun to read and seeing both parts honestly just made it even better and more enjoyable to read. I love then ending where after the boy just let his girl get arrested she talked about her hair routine in prison. I really like the look of the website still and it is just a very high production value all around great job.
Hi Morgan:)
ReplyDeleteI'm so excited to see that you;ve added 2 more stories to your page! First I really like the layout of your page, with the different mug shots of the princesses. Rapunzel is one of my favorite princesses and I love all the different forms of her story. So Im really excited to see how you turn her into a villain! I just read part 1 and I really enjoyed the voice you gave Rapunzel in this story. I think you conveyed her sass and attitude perfectly through this story. And I like how throughout the story she gives her own opinion about what happened. I found your author's note to be really helpful in explaining why you chose the direction you did and also why the story is split up into parts 1 and 2. I agree with your ending in the note, background information is really important. Especially when you're changing up a story and pulling inspiration from somewhere else!
Hi Morgan,
ReplyDeleteI absolutely appreciate the creativity in how you depicted the stories from the dark side of such classic fairy tale stories such as Cinderella and Rapunzel. I think the introduction set up the rest of the stories perfectly, especially about how you mentioned the characters don't always have to have a "happy ending." In the story itself though, what wowed me the most was how you included the heel towards the end of the story that was so prominent in the original story, but adapted in the content of your story. I do wonder though, what ended up happening to Cinderella in prison? Did anyone know about the ravens killing the family after the fact? I think that if you included these parts to your story that it would be a perfect ending and perhaps even create room for an epilogue! I look forward to reading more from you.
Hi Morgan! The concept for your storybook is really cool! I also really like the picture you found for the comment wall, it sets the tone quite well. I really like how you kept the flow of all of your stories really close to the real thing. I think it really helps set up the reader to be surprised when everything about their lives is really dark and not like the fairytales we were told as kids. Also, the images that you used for the banners were absolutely amazing. I love the mugshots. I really feel like a lot of what they did was not really any fault of their own. Like the witch keeping Rapunzel locked up should have been a charge against the witch not on Rapunzel for leaving. I wonder why Cinderella was not allowed past midnight also. Did it have something to do with her mother?
ReplyDeleteHi Morgan,
ReplyDeleteWow you weren't kidding when you said things would get dark! I love that you took the darker original side of Grimm's stories and went with that instead of the sugary Disney versions. I thought your storybook was really clever and fun to read, although I'm not sure I like to think of my favorite princesses as murderers! Ha! Your use of detail and sensory language really helped to put me in the gory details of the stories and I thought it was really great that you had things told from the princess's perspectives. I also thought it was so funny that you found these princess mugshots. I can't believe these already existed. They are perfect for your storybook! My only critique is to maybe give a little more backstory on why the girls are so dark and bothered. Maybe they have troubled childhoods? But that is just me looking for something to pick out. Otherwise, I thought it was great! Good job!