Reading Week 12: Alice in Wonderland, Part B

(Mad Tea Party: Wikipedia)

 A Mad Tea-Party

There was a table set out under a tree where the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea. The table was very crowded but they encouraged Alice to join for these was plenty of room. They offered her wine even though there wasn't any and then the Hatter made personal comments about Alice's appearance like her hair. Alice found this to be rude but the Hatter completely ignored her feelings and began to talk in riddles.  There was bantering back and forth until silence fell upon them. Then the Hatter checked his pocket watch  to check what year it was. This puzzled Alice greatly.

A Mad Tea-Party (cont.)

The dormouse was asleep at the table and the Hatter poured tea on its nose. Then the Hatter asked Alice if she had guessed the riddle which she hadn't and had given up. She told them their riddles were a waste of time and they were confused. She said she beats time when she learns music and the Hatter said he kept time by being on good terms with it. They managed their time quite strangely. The Hatter than shared how he went mad last March when ge had to give a concert and sing to the Queen of Hearts. The Hatter sang his song and within a few verses, the Queen shouted "Off with his head." Alice then realized that was why so many tea things were set out because it was always tea time. The March Hare became bored with he conversation and asked her to tell a story which she didn't know any. She came up with a story about three sisters and they drank tea and drank tea until they had had enough. 

A Mad Tea-Party (end)

Alice helped herself to some tea and bread and butter and turned to the Dormouse and asked why the sisters lived at the bottom of a well. He replied it was a treacle well which angered her since there was no such thing. The Dormouse continued and said the sisters were learning to draw and she interrupted him yet again with her incessant questions. The mouse said they drew water out of the water-well and they drew treacle out of a treacle-well. This confused Alice so much but she let the mouse continue his story. The mouse began to get sleepy and was unable to finish the story before falling asleep. Alice was confused and she asked the Hatter to explain and he responded she shouldn't talk anymore. Alice got up in disgust and walked off and headed back into the woods. One of the trees had a door leading right into it and she went to it. She found herself once again in a long hall and close to a little glass table with a golden key. She nibbled the mushroom and walked down the passage and found herself at last in the beautiful garden among the bright flowers.

The Queen's Croquet-Ground

A large rose-tree was near the entrance of the garden and there were gardeners busily painting the roses red. They were arguing amongst themselves and talking about the Queen and her threats to behead them. When they noticed Alice, they knelt low before her and she asked them why they were all painting the roses. They said they made a mistake by putting in a white rose tree and if the Queen found out, they would be beheaded. Suddenly there were footsteps and the three gardeners yelled "The Queen, The Queen." First came ten soldiers carrying clubs and then after came the royal children, then the guests including the white rabbit, and then came the King and Queen of Hearts. Alice didn't know if she should bow down for the procession when the Queen stopped in front of her. Alice introduced herself and then the Queen asked who the gardeners were laying on the ground. Alice said it was none of her business and the Queen became angry and she said "Off with her head." Alice said it was nonsense and the Queen turned over the gardeners and they jumped up to bow. The Queen realized what they were doing and she demanded they be beheaded. Alice didn't want to see that happen so she put their heads in a large flower-pot nearby. The Queen then invited Alice to come play croquet and she agreed. 

The Queen's Croquet-Ground (cont.)

The white rabbit walked beside Alice and said small talk timidly. Alice asked where the Duchess was and the rabbit hushed her. He told her she was under sentence of execution. It was because she boxed the Queen's ears and Alice laughed. The Queen's voice rumbled as she ordered everyone to their places for croquet. The balls were live hedgehogs, the mallets live flamingos and the soldiers double themselves to make the arches. Alice struggled with the flamingo and the hedgehog kept trying to unroll itself. Alice couldn't help but laugh. It was a difficult game indeed. Everyone played and the Queen was in a furious passion shouting "off with his head" or "off with her head." Alice began to feel uneasy for she had yet had a dispute with the Queen. She looked around for a way to escape when she noticed a curious appearance in the air. It was the Cheshire Cat.

The Queen's Croquet-Ground (end)

Alice put down her mallet and said to the cat she didn't think they were playing fairly and they all quarreled so much. Then Alice said she didn't like the Queen right as she noticed the Queen was close behind listening. The King asked who she was talking to and Alice introduced to him the Cheshire Cat. The King didn't like the sight of him and asked for him to be removed. The Queen settled all her issue with beheading and she hurried off for the executioner. Alice went back to see how the game was going and the everyone and every creature was fighting and quarreling. By the time she caught the flamingo and brought it back, the fighting was over and the hedgehogs were out of sight. When she got back to the Cheshire Cat, she was surprised to see such a large crowd gathered around. There was a dispute going on between the King, Queen and the executioner. When she appeared, she was appealed to by all three to settle the question. The executioner's argument was that you couldn't cut off a head unless there was a body to cut it off from and the King's argument was that anything that had a head could be beheaded. The Queen's argument was that if something wasn't done about it in less than no time, she'd have everybody executed. Alice could think of nothing else to say but that it belonged to the Duchess so they should ask her. The Queen went to fetch her from prison and he came back with the Duchess. The cat's head began fading away and the King ran wildly looking for it. 

Who Stole the Tarts?

The King and Queen were seated on their thrones and a huge crowd had gathered around them. In the middle of the court was a large table with tarts upon it and Alice was hungry looking at them. Alice had never been in a court of justice before but she had read about them in books. The judge was the King and he wore his crown over the wig. The 12 creatures were the jury box and they were busy writing busily on slates. They were all rather stupid and forgetful. The King then asked Herald to read the accusation and the white rabbit blasted the trumped and unrolled the parchment scroll. It said the Knave of Hearts had stolen some tarts. The King called for the first witness who was the Hatter. He came with a teacup in and bread in each hand and he said he finished on the fourteenth of March. The March Hare argued it was a different day. The King had the jury write everything down and demanded the Hatter remove his hat. The Hatter said the hat wasn't his and the King made a memorandum of the fact it was stolen. Then the Queen put on her spectacles and stared the Hatter down. The King demanded he give his evidence but the Hatter rocked back in forth nervously.

Who Stole the Tarts? (cont.)

Suddenly, Alice had a curious sensation and she began to grow larger again.The mouse asked her not to grow and she said it was out of her control. All this time the Queen had never left off staring at the Hatter and she asked for a list of singers in the last concert. The Hatter trembled and he said he was a poor man and he hadn't begun his tea. The Hatter couldn't remember everything and he dropped down on his knees to beg the King. The King told him he must sit down and the guinea pigs cheered. The King dismissed him and he left the court without even putting his shoes back on. The King asked for the next witness who was the Duchess's cook. Everyone was sneezing when he entered and the King asked him what the tarts were made of. He said mostly pepper and treacle. The Queen shrieked for the mouse to be silenced and beheaded. The whole court was in confusion and the King asked for another witness. He told his wife they needed to cross-examine the people. Alice watched the white rabbit fumble over his list feeling very curious to see the next witness. The rabbit in a shrill voice said, Alice. 

Alice's Evidence

Alice announced herself and forgot how large she had grown and tipped over the jury box in a hurry to the court. She picked them up and put them back into place and the King gravely said the trial couldn't proceed until all the jurymen were back in their proper places. Alice had accidently put the Lizard back upside down. The King asked Alice what she knew about this business and she replied she knew nothing. Alice said the word unimportant which threw the King off his game. The King then said anyone more than a mile high must leave the court and asked Alice to leave and she countered their argument. The rabbit tried to keep the peace by claiming there was more evidence to come and a paper had just been picked up. It appeared to be a letter written by somebody in prison. the rabbit opened the letter and was puzzled on who had written it. The Knave claimed he didn't write it and that they couldn't prove he did since there was no signature at the bottom. The King said that only made matters worse and that it meant mischief. This brought about a general of clapping of hands.

Alice's Evidence (cont.)

The Queen said that proved his guilt and Alice said it proved nothing of the sort. The white rabbit put on his spectacles and began reading from the beginning all the verses written. Alice said if anyone could explain then she would give them a sixpence. The jury was recording this entire conversation. The King said if there was no meaning to it then there would be less trouble in the world. The King pointed to the missing tarts on the table and said there was no clearer proof than that. The Queen was furious and therew and inkstand at the Lizard. The King said the words didn't fit and there was silence in the court. The King said it was a pun and to let the jury consider the verdict. The Queen demanded a sentence first and a verdict after. Alice thought this to be complete nonsense and the Queen screamed that she hold her tongue. Alice said she wouldn't and the Queen said "off with her head." Nobody moved and Alice said "who even cares for you?" She said the Queen was nothing but a pack of cards. At this point all the cards rose up into the air and came flying down upon her. She screamed and tried to beat them off. Her sister said "Alice wake up dear!" Alice awoke and said she had such a curious dream and she went on all these strange adventures. Her sister said she had read about all those adventures and to go inside to get her tea. Alice ran off thinking to herself how wonderful her dream had been. 

Bibliography:

Title: Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

Author: Lewis Carroll